An excerpt from my book, The Worship Pastor, has been posted over at Crosswalk. In that excerpt, a part of my chapter on "The Worship Pastor as Mortician," I discuss some of the dos and don'ts that are part of planning and leading worship services for people who are suffering, especially for funerals and memorial services. I've made my fair share of mistakes, and I've seen many well-intentioned worship leaders inadvertently do some of those same un-pastoral things in those contexts.
One really pertinent piece of pastoral advice: "shut up and play." :)
Please check out the article, and please go get my book!